The Tale of America's Shadow Presidents: From Biden Staffers to Elon Musk
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The country is, as usual, in shambles—nothing new there. From a president who can’t seem to make a decision on his own to a government shutdown narrowly avoided (again), it’s clear that the wheels are falling off the democracy bus. But don’t worry, America’s shadow president is here to save the day—though, frankly, it looks like they might be doing more harm than good. Over the past 48 hours, we’ve witnessed two glaring examples of America's unhealthy relationship with shadow figures who pull the strings outside of the Oval office. While Joe Biden's cognitive decline was becoming an open secret, his staffers were busy assuming presidential duties, and Elon Musk, that ever-present force of chaos, found himself holding the reins of government funding. Both scenarios spell trouble for the state of our democracy, and yet they also continue the nation's long, sordid history of shadow presidencies.
Weekend at Biden’s
Let’s start with Joe Biden, who, let’s face it, has been mentally declining for some time now. The real puzzle is how anyone could’ve bought into the myth that he was mentally fit for office in the first place. The Democratic elites pushed him through in 2020, and somehow we all just went along with it, even though the signs were there from the jump. The latest Wall Street Journal report dropped a bombshell revealing how the White House scrambled to cover up Biden’s cognitive decline, and it was as ugly as you’d imagine. His staffers started shortening meetings, limiting his public interactions, and acting as intermediaries between him and Congress. Public speeches? Forget it. They were more scripted than a soap opera. Biden’s handlers tried to create a bubble around him, insulating him from bad polling and the American people from the harsh reality that the president of the United States was no longer making the big calls.
As the walls of secrecy grew thicker, the Democratic Party crumbled beneath the weight of their own lies. Instead of confronting the truth—Biden was no longer capable of doing the job—they doubled down on protecting their political asset, even if that meant the entire country had to suffer for it. And let's not sugarcoat it: this wasn’t just a case of old age creeping up on him; it was a strategic move to maintain power at all costs. The Democrats were more afraid of losing control of the White House than the the potential collapse of American democracy they warned us about so fervently. The hand-holding of Biden, by aides and the media, wasn’t just a poor decision—it was crippling. They put party loyalty above the well-being of the nation. In hindsight, it’s hard to fathom that anyone thought keeping him in power for as long as they did wouldn’t come with serious consequences. And Biden’s legacy? Well, you can just throw that out the window.
And as the gatekeeping grew more intense and the walls around him rose higher, the Democratic Party was crumbling beneath the feet of this White House’s bad decisions. They’re hand holding of Biden was cripplingly the party. At the time I’m sure they didn’t know in the moment—although I find it hard to now know—that what they were doing would tarnish Biden’s legacy so greatly. Biden couldn’t make his own decisions, but instead of upholding the democracy they feared was so heavily endanger, they chose to preserve power.
Oh, and let’s not pretend running Biden in 2020 wasn’t a colossal mistake from the get-go. (I said it then, and I’ll say it now.) The Democratic Party essentially handed away its incumbency advantage, fully aware that Biden was a one-term president at best. So, instead of positioning themselves for a long-term political win, they chose to back a candidate who was clearly in decline. And here we are, with the country paying the price and the Democrats continuing their gerontocracy—forever missing the hint and never understanding what their constituents really want.
Elon Musk’s Government Funding Bill
And then there’s Elon Musk—because of course, he’s involved. The man who thinks he’s the real-life Tony Stark has somehow wormed his way into the very heart of American politics. This week, Musk, in his infinite wisdom, became the de facto decision-maker when it came to government funding. It turns out that he gets to decide what’s in and what’s out of a government funding package. Musk flexed his muscles and rallied opposition to a 1,547-page funding bill, demanding that certain provisions be removed. And what did he want to cut? Well, a few crucial programs like anti-deepfake porn initiatives, research for premature labor, sickle cell treatment, early breast cancer detection, Down syndrome research, consumer protection against hidden hotel fees, and—oh, just casually—pediatric cancer research. Yes, you read that right. Musk and MAGA Republicans made sure that $190 million in funding for pediatric cancer research was eliminated.
It’s almost too absurd to even comprehend. You would think that in a country that prides itself on innovation and progress, the government would be all in on funding life-saving medical research. But Musk’s cuts—what I’m calling "The Musk Plan" now—pulled the rug out from under programs that could have made a real difference in the lives of vulnerable Americans.
Elon Musk, not the actual president, managed to become the real power broker in Washington. Trump isn’t even back in office yet, and Musk already holds more sway over government spending than Biden does. If that doesn’t raise alarm bells, I don’t know what will. The government was hours away from a partial shutdown, and it wasn’t Biden or Republican House Speaker Mike Johnson pulling the strings—it was Musk. And the fact that he secured a win for Republicans by axing crucial medical research just shows how much influence he really has. Is this what we’ve come to? A billionaire with a track record of questionable decisions and an ego the size of Mars gets to decide which programs live and which programs die? This is the shadow presidency in action, and it’s terrifying.
Four More Years of Elon Musk as President?
Now, the million-dollar question: how long will Elon Musk remain the shadow president before his relationship with Trump implodes? Musk may be on top now, but with Trump’s fragile ego, it’s only a matter of time before their alliance falls apart. Musk’s power in Washington is undeniable, but so is Trump’s tendency to burn bridges with anyone who doesn’t feed his ego 24/7. The two might be a match made in hell, but the fire won’t burn forever.
But don’t worry—if Musk’s reign as shadow president is short-lived, there are plenty of other corporate overlords, billionaires, and CEOs waiting in the wings to pick up where he left off. After all, America’s shadow presidency is a well-established tradition. It’s been going on for decades, and I don’t see it disappearing anytime soon.
Whether it’s Biden, Trump, Musk, or the next tech mogul, the real decisions are being made behind closed doors, far away from the people who are supposed to represent us. We’re in the age of the shadow presidency—where the future of democracy is decided by those with the deepest pockets and the least accountability.